Separate names with a comma.
A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often.
Whats another word for Thesaurus? Steven Wright
All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height. Casey Stengel
Save the Earth, it's the only planet with Chocolate
Impotence: nature's way of saying "No Hard Feelings".
There are two kinds of drivers - those who make dust and those who eat it.
My reality check just bounced!!
The number of people staring at you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your actions.
I hear you lost your cat? Check under my tire.
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Nothing is illegal until you get caught.
I’m not a complete idiot - some parts are missing.
If love is blind why is lingerie so popular?
If it's tourist season, does that mean we can shoot them?
Man says to his wife - I'm now the unofficial expert on all sexual matters at my company. Wife says - Really? How did that happen? Man says...
Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
A fool and his money are a girl's best friend.
Don't think son..........you'll hurt the team.
Pokemon, a Jamaican proctologist.