3rd Gen F56 Cooper S Most liked posts in thread: 2014 MINI F56 S Caught Nekkid...

I know Jim, but when I looked at the headlights in the pic, first thing that came to mind was Igor.... Lol

 

Well, that settles it. Whichever MA member receives the first F56 must name it "Marty." Or else.



Open letter to the post-Stephenson MINI styling teams:

"YOU HAVE BEEN SAT TO LONG HERE FOR ANY GOOD YOU HAVE BEEN DOING. DEPART, I SAY, AND LET US HAVE DONE WITH YOU. IN THE NAME OF GOD, GO!"

 

The lights.... All of them... They are hideous, and kill anything the might have got right with the new design!
Its not like the aftermarket can help that either... The whole size and shape looks as if somebody fish eyed it in photoshop!

Makes me sick MINI has gotten this bad! I would save some cash and get a new turbo KIA optima over that thing.

 

But its like a pack of coyotes going after a baby lamb that wandered out of the heard... Or the harry shemale thing in line at Wally World... Maybe the horrific car wreck they are trying to hide with sheets on the interstate...
You cant help but look at it, but deep down you know you are going to not like what you see.

 

Ok here is my DAVE.0 visual review whether you want it or not. :lol:

Wow cool a NEW MINI and look it's Orange and looks just like a Halloween jack-o-lantern.

Maybe the high school kids will come and smash it after Halloween if we are lucky.:lol:

That car is so ugly it looks like the little fish from Finding NEMO fish slept with a FIAT. Yup a FIAT.

Also what's up with the mail slot hood scoop? It's a Turdblow and does not need air coming in the scoop for the intercooler like the R53. It needs more air down low were the turbo I/C located. Maybe the scoop is just to try and look cool like an R53 who knows.

I see MINI also found some old huge Lincoln Navigator taillight and put them to use.

I can't look at that car anymore I just ate Dinner.

 

Mark, that photo--you should pass it on to MINI USA, it should be the first officially offered roof graphic for the F56.

 

Does the F stand for fugly? :lol:

 

Feldman.

 

You mean like this? :lol:

CarLashes are on sale right now through Groupon. (Don't ask me how I know ...) :eek6:

 

...and I'm 80% on Dave's side.

BTW, it's spelled N-E-Double K-By Gawd-E-D which means you ain't got no clothes on and you up to sumptin' as opposed to n-a-k-e-d which only means you ain't got no clothes on.

 

Thank God I ordered a '14 MCS Roadster. By time I'm ready for my next MINI, surely they will have changed the disproportionate, ugly, random front end of the F56. Maybe the new MINI 'sports car' (2015-16) will be a complete breakaway form the F56. One can only hope.

I have to go with Dave.O on this one IF the photographs truly show the F56 being released in 2014.

 

Et Tu Brute? I still like it and PLEASE keep your pants on Friskie.

Jim

 

Maybe Chevy Chase is going to do another one of those "vacation" movies....... The Clarkmobile!!

 

GM tried to appeal to every single person too, and along the way they forgot how to build cars people wanted.....

Correct me if I am wrong but me believes Mini sales have been down ......not up.

 

Sales were down in Sept and Oct of 2013 too.....guess it was winter somewhere......where's All Gore when we need him? Lol:sly:

 

Actually seeing it on ground level changes the appearance of the car from the original photos... Before I thought it looked like a little fish... now, it's less of one. Too much chrome, but I agree, that color is perfect!

*Edit: The lines of the older gens accented the front end so well, giving it a nice refined edge. These are more like blobs... gotta see it in person I guess. If you squint it makes it slightly look like the front grill shape from the Austin Mini's...

 

Well those long lens shots kind of distort the per-portions. It still is recognizable as a MINI.

Those DRL make it look like a cartoon character from the movie Cars. Are those giant tail lights lifted from a countryguy?

Plenty of ground clearance for those of us who travel on gravel roads. :wink:

The color needs more Blu....

 

If that was my only car, and I had to drive it, I would drive it in reverse, so hopefully no one would notice the front.

 

Mark, that was harsh, coming from a guy that no longer owns a MINI. :lol::lol:

Jim