3rd Gen F56 Cooper S My thoughts on the F56

Discussion in '3rd Generation: 2014+ F54, F55, F56, F57, F60' started by yellowbritishrocket, Sep 2, 2015.

Tags:
  1. yellowbritishrocket

    yellowbritishrocket Well-Known Member

    May 16, 2009
    618
    277
    63
    Ratings:
    +277 / 0 / -0
    So ive had people complain that I rag on the F56 for being basically a gulping carp face with a baboon @ss strapped to it... well ive had a F56 "S" loaner for about a month... and here are my thoughts


    Things I Like: Engine

    Things I Don't: everything else

    Exterior... for the damn life of me...WHY MINI... the car just does not look good from any angle...and the more I look at it the more I realized why mini trotted out the classic again and trying to invoke the old commercials desperately trying to convince others and themselves its just as good

    Also...WHY DO YOU STILL OFFER HALOGEN LIGHTS...I cant see for s**t with them...and why are you still doing halogen fog lights...weren't leds supposed to be the norm?

    The car is just a exercise when they let several committees take care of different parts of the car then give their ideas to a cartoonist to do a character drawing...

    Interior... WTF! MINI...we need to have a talk about design style and finish... how do you make something feel cheap and expensive at the same time...

    my R61 has tactile material on the dash and doors...with the plastic bits minimized to trim pieces.... so why mini did you give the doors the look of the tactile materials but its cheap hard plastic?

    and the stock radio... why on gods earth would you choose to stuff a radio in the center area that looks like you took the display for a early 90s BMW...enough with the orange and red... a 150 dollar radio from best buy has a better display

    and while we are on that... the LED ring...look I get you try and incorporate the radio controls and other status in the ring... but why wouldn't you just use a LED display that digitally displays the speedo in the center...

    the seats are damn annoying...its like trying to sit in those high bolstered race seats... the bolsters hit me right in the perennial nerve and my leg falls asleep... plugs I had that vw tartan plad crap...

    the speedo is annoying as hell... if you are previous mini owner and you have a F56 you know what im talking about... the tach shouldn't be a lump they threw on after the fact... im surprised they didn't just delete it and let people try and figure it out


    also...MINI...dipstick... if someone doesn't know what they are doing they will never check their oil level... I see a future lawsuit about that

    also...stick with a design... the half @ssed design shows... lets have downtubes but they are going to be a few inches high but recessed under the dash so you cant tell where they are... also... why is there dual zone climate control... I turn one side full cold and one side full hot and at best it was lukewarm....IT DOESNT WORK AND ITS A WASTE... also 200 dollars for the piano black is a rip off... considering how little its used...


    Engine:... not bad... good torque...but why would you water it down...its nice its a 2.0L but you can feel its been kneecapped


    transmission... you clowns have me seeing red about this... this thing came with the 6spd auto... why...why do you continue to use the shite aisin slushbox... when in auto/auto sport mode... it has Tourettes... hit the gas and it tries to sing you a song by hitting every gear but not sticking with one... also the shifting is clunky as hell... and in manual mode there is a def hesitation before it shifts.... BMW...you have a DCT available... USE IT YOU @SSCLOWNS

    Suspension/handling: Atrocious... this thing weeble wobbles like a drunk pig... the car when shown a corner at low speed is ok...show it some actual speed...what most of us is normal in any other mini... and it acts like hanging on for dear life...and its losing the battle.. I think the combination of the heavy slushbox with all of the overhang...but a lower F56 hardtop shouldn't act like a stock countryman non awd...


    all in all I call this car a failure in almost every regard... never have I driven a mini that made me so mad I was gnashing my teeth in anger... frankly why people are buying this thing is beyond me....just go get the BMW with the same engine just not watered down... probably weighs the same
     
  2. cct1

    cct1 Well-Known Member
    Lifetime Supporter

    May 5, 2009
    3,378
    3,368
    113
    Ratings:
    +3,369 / 0 / -0
    Dave, is that you?
     
  3. WolfGTI

    WolfGTI Active Member

    May 21, 2009
    387
    217
    43
    NJ
    Ratings:
    +217 / 0 / -0
    Becareful, you'll get banned.:devil:
     
  4. yellowbritishrocket

    yellowbritishrocket Well-Known Member

    May 16, 2009
    618
    277
    63
    Ratings:
    +277 / 0 / -0
    pfffbt...care I do not lol...
     
  5. Eric@Helix

    [email protected] New Member
    Motoring Alliance Founding Sponsor

    May 4, 2009
    1,154
    1,257
    0
    Shepherd
    Philadelphia
    Ratings:
    +1,257 / 0 / -0
    Nah, Dave would have simply said: "It's a piece of SH#T."

    Within 12 or so months, we'll find out whether it's just the MINI enthusiasts who are reacting so negatively to the F56, or whether it's the public that also thinks so. The model cycle is now at a point where just-being-a-new-car won't prop up sales: the real success of the model will now be measured. Third quarter sales are off 5% year-over-year, which doesn't look promising.
     
  6. whaap

    whaap New Member

    Jan 10, 2014
    515
    313
    0
    retired
    Tucson, Arizona
    Ratings:
    +313 / 0 / -0
    I can't think of any car that hasn't been ragged on by someone. That's why they make vanilla and chocolate.
     
  7. cct1

    cct1 Well-Known Member
    Lifetime Supporter

    May 5, 2009
    3,378
    3,368
    113
    Ratings:
    +3,369 / 0 / -0
    That's true, and BMW survived the Bangle years where people separated into camps questioning each other's chromosomal stability and ancestry; it'll be interesting to see how this all plays out, but I think who buys these newer cars as a group is significantly different from who bought gen 1 and gen 2, I think many (not all, but many) of those people have been lost. Which is a shame, it would have been cool if the hardcore enthusiasts stayed on board like what happens with many iconic cars.

    Personally, I think the MINI brand will be fine. Not sure about the MINI hardtop, as I think it may become more of an afterthought, and production will probably decline, but the brand as a whole will probably remain profitable.

    What I'd love to see are those numbers again of sales broken down by car model by country.
     
  8. Nathan

    Nathan Founder

    Mar 30, 2009
    25,144
    10,032
    113
    Writer
    Short North
    Ratings:
    +10,049 / 0 / -0
    #8 Nathan, Sep 2, 2015
    Last edited: Sep 2, 2015
    Let us see what my Google-Fu can uncover...

    For starters

    MINI sales worldwide by month
     
  9. Rawhyde

    Rawhyde Active Member

    Apr 7, 2012
    311
    233
    43
    Facilities Engineer
    Mountains of NW Georgia
    Ratings:
    +233 / 0 / -0
    Way back about the time dirt was first invented, I was in the market for a new car. I was hellbent on something called a 330Ci.

    I was enticed into test driving a Cooper S. The driving dynamics of the MINI changed my mind immediately. About a year later, I became the proud owner of a 2005 Cooper S with all of the luxury options and all of the performance enhancing JCW upgrades (I skipped the JCW carbon fiber cosmetic stuff).

    I loved that car when I got it, and a little over ten years later, I still do. I didn't love it for the trendy looks or quirky marketing, I loved how it drove. It was direct, it had instantaneous responses, it clung to the road like it was on rails, and it could stop like dropping an anchor. (Not literally, but I've never seen a car that a working person could ever hope to afford that drives better. )

    When the R56 came out, the dealers called all of the owners of the older cars in to test drive the new version. When they saw my car, the dealer didn't want me to drive the R56 demo car. They wanted to scour the lot for a new Cooper S that had the optional sport suspension package. Seems that the new version came with the softer suspension unless it was ordered otherwise. Hmmmmm.

    Now, the F56 debuts being even larger, heavier, and according to the OP...not so great handling.... We're supposed to be thrilled that the car has been watered down? Or has more "mass market" appeal?

    I'd love to drive one and see for myself what they are really like. I already know I don't like the lack of a CD player, and I already hate TV screens in all cars other than the Knight Industries 2000.

    Maybe someone ought to make a really small car, make it deceptively cute looking, make tons of options available, and give it balls of steel....
     
  10. cct1

    cct1 Well-Known Member
    Lifetime Supporter

    May 5, 2009
    3,378
    3,368
    113
    Ratings:
    +3,369 / 0 / -0
    What I would like to see is a breakdown by model--someone posted this earlier, probably you--where it broke down the countryman, hardtop, etc. But it was for the U.S. I'm interested in what that breakdown looks like in other countries, for s&g's. I'm not even sure each model is sold in every country, but knowing what the percentages are in Europe for example would be interesting.
     
  11. Nathan

    Nathan Founder

    Mar 30, 2009
    25,144
    10,032
    113
    Writer
    Short North
    Ratings:
    +10,049 / 0 / -0
  12. cct1

    cct1 Well-Known Member
    Lifetime Supporter

    May 5, 2009
    3,378
    3,368
    113
    Ratings:
    +3,369 / 0 / -0
    Lol I googled that earlier and missed the breakdown at the bottom of the page, I just looked at the chart and figured it wasn't there.

    But the countryman numbers aren't there.

    August U.S. sales show the two door hardtop leading sales, followed by the countryman and 4 door hard top.

    MINI USA August Year-on-Year Sales Up 2.1% - MotoringFile

    It's just one month, but maybe the two door hardtop is safer than I thought. I'm more an interested observer at this point, since I've made my permanent bed with the R53, but I'll continue to watch the numbers.
     
  13. rkw

    rkw Well-Known Member

    May 7, 2009
    1,253
    443
    83
    San Francisco
    Ratings:
    +449 / 0 / -0
    Not all of the numbers are necessarily available, just like Amazon doesn't release sales numbers of Kindles. You can deduce what you can from what they announce in press releases.

    Here's UK sales in 2014: https://www.press.bmwgroup.com/united-kingdom/pressDetail.html?title=bmw-group-uk-reports-record-sales-in-2014&outputChannelId=8&id=T0199644EN_GB&left_menu_item=node__804

    Out of 53,661 sold, 28,000 were the 3 and 5 door hatch. The Countryman would make up most of the rest.
     
  14. Firebro17

    Firebro17 Dazed, but not Confused
    Lifetime Supporter

    Sep 18, 2010
    7,819
    3,322
    113
    Retired CAL FIRE Battalion Chief
    The Great Irrigated Desert of Central CA
    Ratings:
    +3,323 / 0 / -0
    Thanks for the first-hand write up Roger. The car definitely has its shortcomings to say the least. I've never driven one and likely won't make the time. I looked one over pretty thoroughly at Laguna a few months ago and came away with mixed feelings. The styling didn't hit me as hard as you've described, but that's just me...

    Candid as your report is, I know anyone who is familiar with you and your love for all things MINI/Mini, will appreciate your review.
     
  15. FranticFreddy

    FranticFreddy Drive-N-Eat
    Lifetime Supporter

    May 4, 2009
    435
    325
    63
    Some Where between here and there.
    Ratings:
    +328 / 0 / -0
    It's just ugly. Case closed.

    The people buying today's MINI would not have bought yesterday's MINI. IMO.
     
  16. JackMac

    JackMac Well-Known Member

    Jan 1, 2010
    399
    251
    63
    PA
    Ratings:
    +256 / 0 / -0
    Drive a nicely optioned JCW manual, with aftermarket suspension, and you may come back with a different opinion. I did.

    I was not a fan of the R56 "S" either, until the JCW came along. It's the same thing with the F56.
     
  17. yellowbritishrocket

    yellowbritishrocket Well-Known Member

    May 16, 2009
    618
    277
    63
    Ratings:
    +277 / 0 / -0
    here is the thing...i shouldnt have to go get a JCW with an aftermarket suspension... the car should stand on its own with people modding them to get a bit more umph or handling... you shouldnt have to go right out and unscrew the entire car to make it somewhat more like a mini... there is a difference between the 2nd and 3rd gens and its not just the powerplant... despite the fact a S has less than 200hp stock even though its a 2.0L engine... also you cannot cure things like the body overhang that leads to a wallowing rolling feeling... i didnt have nearly the confidence taking corners i can take in my JCW paceman or classic mini at the same speeds... also the brakes just suck something aweful... in the S they upgraded the torque and engine... but it has the same brakes that have been around since the R53 JCW brakes... at the least make the 4pot JCWs from the 2nd gen hardtops standard since they use the 6 pots from the GP2 in the F56 JCW... ive always maintained with sports cars like minis the car should stand on its own... every model up till this point has acquitted itself... this one i have zero confidence in
     
  18. Loganisle

    Loganisle New Member

    May 6, 2013
    4
    1
    0
    Pays the bills
    Clearwater, FL
    Ratings:
    +1 / 0 / -0
    I guess I'm gonna put my 2 cents worth in also. I drove an F56 yesterday as a loaner, and have driven them quite a bit since they were introduced (no, I don't work for the dealership but I do know people).

    Firstly, to qualify my thoughts, I fell in love with my R53 at first drive. Love that little thing! I was resistant to the Paceman S, but drove one around for an event last year (and about a week following) and ended up driving it home as well. And last but most certainly not least, I just invested in a classic that's been essentially built into a Mini race car with a 1380cc that really powers it through the corners. I love all three of my Minis and appreciate the differences.

    Having said all that, the F56 will never be "MINI" to me. It drives so much differently, the car gets squirrely and weeble wobbles through the corners (kinda reminded me of a Countryman. . . but worse), but you can get her going in a straight line pretty well.

    If I were forced to take an F56 home, I'd certainly choose the manual over the automatic. The automatic definitely stutters and you just mash the pedal and wait for the gearing to catch up. Not so in the manual. Even with that, I feel like there's too much nose hanging out there, the car is noticeably heavier than previous models, and I feel like I'd need to lower it 4 inches, throw some sporty suspension on, and then I might have something that resembles a MINI.

    I'm not thrilled with the new interior design. More because I feel like I'm driving a BMW than anything. I enjoyed the quirky (and, by the way, easily accessible) locations of the window and lock switches. If I WANTED a "normal" car, I'd have BOUGHT a "normal" car. I believe BMW has just negated the "NOT NORMAL"ness of the MINI. Also, it'd be nice if you could turn off all the led fanciness. The led ring around the old center speedo location is downright distracting in the dark.

    But my newest problem with this MINI is the braking. I unfortunately had the need to try out the ABS yesterday. There IS ABS on these things, right???? Because I'm not so sure. This is Florida, it was spotty rain, the idjit in the big SUV in front of me was not only tail gaiting, but also didn't have brake lights.

    SOOO happy I had 3 car lengths in front of me. It took at least two car lengths to come to a dead stop from approx 45-55 mph. I'm not so sure this MINI had ABS (isn't that standard nowadays?) because I pushed the pedal to the floor and was quickly running into no other options than to try to go off the shoulder into the guard wall by the time the vehicle came to a complete stop. Look, I understand bigger cars taking longer to stop. I own a Paceman for heaven's sake, but even it stops faster than the F56 I was in yesterday.

    On my own behalf, I can tend to be a bit of a purist. I do love my classic and Gen 1 the best, but I am open minded enough to see the pluses of the other models and, in some ways of the F56. . . if you're a "normal" person seeking better gas mileage for your daily commute or you're just looking for a "car". But so long as MINI heads in this direction (and mucking up the clubby to boot), my Paceman will likely be the last new MINI I buy.
     
  19. CHKMINI

    CHKMINI Club Coordinator
    Lifetime Supporter

    Sep 1, 2009
    9,232
    3,792
    113
    Ratings:
    +3,845 / 0 / -1

    You don't like, we get that and a lot of people don't. It appears though that quite a bunch do like it and MINI will survive with or without the early enthusiasts. It's a business, it's not a club or a family or a beauty contest...it's a business and right now it looks successful to those charged with running it and producing results for the shareholders. They don't give a rats ass whether it's liked or not....it's a business.
     
  20. Crashton

    Crashton Club Coordinator

    Jun 4, 2009
    18,868
    9,430
    113
    Retired old fart
    Hooterville Ohio USA
    Ratings:
    +10,454 / 2 / -0
    This is so true.
     

Share This Page