Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I have.
Then they call me ugly and broke.
Page 54 of 88
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ScottinBend Space CowboySupporting Member
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From a syllabus of instruction for women offered by the male faculty:
How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an
Insurance Claim.
Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.-
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ScottinBend Space CowboySupporting Member
What's green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?
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A pool table-
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Firebro17 Dazed, but not ConfusedLifetime Supporter
- Sep 18, 2010
- 3,327
- Retired CAL FIRE Battalion Chief
- Ratings:
- +3,328 / 0 / -0
We lost all power in our house this morning... No internet connection, no coffee maker, garage door wouldn't open to get out and go get breakfast. So, I sat on the couch and talked to my wife for a couple hours until the lights came back on. She seems like a nice person.
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Dave.0 Helix & RMW PoweredLifetime Supporter
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When you're performing an exorcism on a drunk, at least you know the vomit is real.
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TheModFather Well-Known Member
- May 15, 2012
- 5,310
- 11 years in the ARMY, 2 years of being a multitale
- Ratings:
- +5,322 / 0 / -0
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Firebro17 Dazed, but not ConfusedLifetime Supporter
- Sep 18, 2010
- 3,327
- Retired CAL FIRE Battalion Chief
- Ratings:
- +3,328 / 0 / -0
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Johnny Cash wrote a check or two, so things aren't always what they're named.
- Floyd The Trucker-
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ScottinBend Space CowboySupporting Member
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ScottinBend Space CowboySupporting Member
I remember when the candle shop burned down. Everyone stood around singing 'Happy Birthday.'
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One bright morning...
in the middle of the night,
two dead boys came out to fight.
they stood back to back
and faced each other
drew their swords
and shot each other.
the deaf policeman heard the noise
and came to kill
those two dead boys.
If u dont believe my story
its true ask the blind man he saw it too!-
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Page 54 of 88