Fun & Games Scott's funny saying of the day......

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by ScottinBend, Dec 11, 2013.

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  1. minirab

    minirab Well-Known Member

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    I'm the same as you, best friends with me.
     
  2. ScottinBend

    ScottinBend Space Cowboy
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    What is The Secret to Success? Pretend you've already achieved it- Then offer to sell The Secret to others.
     
  3. CFMINI

    CFMINI New Member

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    When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'

    Steven Wright
     
  4. Firebro17

    Firebro17 Dazed, but not Confused
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    #324 Firebro17, Jan 22, 2014
    Last edited: Jan 23, 2014
    Law of Gravity..... Any nut, bolt, washer or tool (when dropped) will roll to the least accessible corner just beyond your reach.
     
  5. teresa wood

    teresa wood Well-Known Member
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    #325 teresa wood, Jan 22, 2014
    Last edited: Jan 22, 2014
    Not all that funny but...This is SO true!!!
    "If we did all the things we are capable of, we would astound ourselves." Thomas Edison
     
  6. TheModFather

    TheModFather Well-Known Member

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    A yawn is just a silent scream for more coffee.
     
  7. Nathan

    Nathan Founder

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    Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
     
  8. CFMINI

    CFMINI New Member

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    Cole’s Law: Thinly Sliced Cabbage
     
  9. ScottinBend

    ScottinBend Space Cowboy
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    You may not have lost all of your marbles, but there's definitely a hole in the bag.
     
  10. Nathan

    Nathan Founder

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    The probability of meeting someone you know increases a hundredfold when you're with someone you're not supposed to be seen with.
     
  11. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

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    ...happens to pastor Weaver every time he sneaks into the neighborhood liquor store.
     
  12. CFMINI

    CFMINI New Member

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    I wish I were a glow worm, a glow worm is never glum, because how could you be unhappy when the sun shines out your bum?
     
  13. Dave.0

    Dave.0 Helix & RMW Powered
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    A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
    A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
     
  14. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

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    I was always told to respect my elders but as time goes by, it's getting harder and harder to find any.
     
  15. Dave.0

    Dave.0 Helix & RMW Powered
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    How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
    Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell ‘BINGO!’ :lol:
     
  16. eMINIparts

    eMINIparts Well-Known Member
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    If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
     
  17. CFMINI

    CFMINI New Member

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    I took a pain pill. Why are you still here?
     
  18. DryMartini

    DryMartini New Member

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    I'm retired. I don't do anything and I don't start until after 10:00.
     
  19. ScottinBend

    ScottinBend Space Cowboy
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    I like to refer to farts as ringing the Taco Bell
     
  20. DryMartini

    DryMartini New Member

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    I wouldn't belong to any club that would allow someone like me to be a member.

    Marx (Groucho, that is.)
     

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