Fun & Games Scott's funny saying of the day......

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by ScottinBend, Dec 11, 2013.

Tags:
  1. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    1,650
    1,333
    113
    Highly motivated retiree
    In the here and now, for now.
    Ratings:
    +1,339 / 0 / -0
    Mmmmm (as he taps his pencil against the clipboard) and just how does that make you feel?
     
  2. ScottinBend

    ScottinBend Space Cowboy
    Supporting Member

    May 4, 2009
    8,767
    2,547
    113
    Bend, OR USA
    Ratings:
    +2,678 / 1 / -0
    Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?



    A: Run like hell....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
     
  3. Dave.0

    Dave.0 Helix & RMW Powered
    Lifetime Supporter

    May 4, 2009
    25,021
    13,497
    113
    Burbs of Philly, PA
    Ratings:
    +14,644 / 10 / -4
    Q:Why do blondes love tilt steering?

    A:More head room




    Q:Why do blondes like Sunroofs?

    A: More legroom




    Q:What do you call a dead blonde in a closet?

    A:1983 hide and go seek Champion




    [​IMG]
     
  4. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    1,650
    1,333
    113
    Highly motivated retiree
    In the here and now, for now.
    Ratings:
    +1,339 / 0 / -0
    An invisible man married an invisible woman. The kids were nothin' to look at either.
     
  5. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    1,650
    1,333
    113
    Highly motivated retiree
    In the here and now, for now.
    Ratings:
    +1,339 / 0 / -0
    ~accidental repeat~
     
  6. Nathan

    Nathan Founder

    Mar 30, 2009
    25,144
    10,052
    113
    Writer
    Short North
    Ratings:
    +10,069 / 0 / -0
    In these times of being correct at all cost we no longer have homeless people. They are now "Free Range Humans"
     
  7. ScottinBend

    ScottinBend Space Cowboy
    Supporting Member

    May 4, 2009
    8,767
    2,547
    113
    Bend, OR USA
    Ratings:
    +2,678 / 1 / -0
    Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35mph Are Also Timed For 70mph.
     
  8. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    1,650
    1,333
    113
    Highly motivated retiree
    In the here and now, for now.
    Ratings:
    +1,339 / 0 / -0
    Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
     
  9. teresa wood

    teresa wood Well-Known Member
    Lifetime Supporter

    Aug 21, 2012
    1,237
    761
    113
    Broker Associate Coldwell Banker, North Metro offi
    Arvada, Colorado
    Ratings:
    +761 / 0 / -0
    It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
     
  10. ScottinBend

    ScottinBend Space Cowboy
    Supporting Member

    May 4, 2009
    8,767
    2,547
    113
    Bend, OR USA
    Ratings:
    +2,678 / 1 / -0
    The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.....:beer
     
  11. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    1,650
    1,333
    113
    Highly motivated retiree
    In the here and now, for now.
    Ratings:
    +1,339 / 0 / -0
    I went to buy some camouflage trousers today and couldn't find any.
     
  12. DryMartini

    DryMartini New Member

    Dec 6, 2012
    1,048
    479
    0
    Ratings:
    +479 / 0 / -0
    I can't see what you're saying.
     
  13. ScottinBend

    ScottinBend Space Cowboy
    Supporting Member

    May 4, 2009
    8,767
    2,547
    113
    Bend, OR USA
    Ratings:
    +2,678 / 1 / -0
    Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator?

    A: She couldn't find the 10 key.
     
  14. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    1,650
    1,333
    113
    Highly motivated retiree
    In the here and now, for now.
    Ratings:
    +1,339 / 0 / -0
    Q: What did the mare say to the colt?


    A: It's pasture bedtime.
     
  15. TheModFather

    TheModFather Well-Known Member

    May 15, 2012
    6,023
    5,310
    113
    11 years in the ARMY, 2 years of being a multitale
    North Denver CO.
    Ratings:
    +5,322 / 0 / -0
    Ever notice that if you put the wrong head on an animal, it stops being an animal, and becomes...

    [​IMG]

    Hilarious!
     
  16. ScottinBend

    ScottinBend Space Cowboy
    Supporting Member

    May 4, 2009
    8,767
    2,547
    113
    Bend, OR USA
    Ratings:
    +2,678 / 1 / -0
    Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
     
  17. teresa wood

    teresa wood Well-Known Member
    Lifetime Supporter

    Aug 21, 2012
    1,237
    761
    113
    Broker Associate Coldwell Banker, North Metro offi
    Arvada, Colorado
    Ratings:
    +761 / 0 / -0
    Most people are only alive because it's illegal to shoot them.
     
  18. Dave.0

    Dave.0 Helix & RMW Powered
    Lifetime Supporter

    May 4, 2009
    25,021
    13,497
    113
    Burbs of Philly, PA
    Ratings:
    +14,644 / 10 / -4
    I used to have that on top of my monitor at a old job. :lol::lol::lol::lol:
     
  19. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    1,650
    1,333
    113
    Highly motivated retiree
    In the here and now, for now.
    Ratings:
    +1,339 / 0 / -0
    Two peanuts walk into a bar. One was a salted.
     
  20. Friskie

    Friskie Well-Known Member

    Jul 20, 2009
    1,650
    1,333
    113
    Highly motivated retiree
    In the here and now, for now.
    Ratings:
    +1,339 / 0 / -0
    {Just got this and gotta share it}
    A father asks his 10 year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees.

    "I don't want to know" he says bursting into tears, "Promise me you won't tell me."
    Confused, the father asked what was wrong.
    The boy sobbed, "when I was six, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech.
    At seven, I got the 'There's no Tooth fairy' speech.
    When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no Santa' speech.
    If you're going to tell me that grown-ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for."
     

Share This Page