Most liked posts in thread: TSA Searches and Scans

Well......
A flock of nuns might be de-flocked during the TSA search, so that wouldn't work.

Ha, there would sure be a lot of flocking going down with that.

Nope, I'm sticking with covey.

 

....of course they could just tell the TSA that it's Nun of their business and take a bus....

 

I'm gonna open a topless bar in my town and call it "The TSA"

Greatest free marketing evah

 

I used to fly LOT (Polish airlines) just at the tail end of the Communist era and they made El Al look like pussycats. Two guys would get on the plane with kitbags (the sort that clanked), sit in the rear two aisle seats and kick forwards the seatbacks of the empty seats in front. A colleague once asked why they did that and was shocked by the answer: better field of fire.

For the passengers the rule was that you stayed seated. If you needed to stand up, for example to go to the toilet, you pressed the call button and when the stewardess standing next to you got the OK from the guys in the back, she would let you stand up. Forgetting to press the call button might get you shot.

They never had an hijackings either......

However I don't suggest they were actually all that effective, just dramatic. I put my money on El Al any day.

However the scariest thing was the stewardesses on those LOT flights - they all looked like they were on a job share with the 'care' staff at a secure mental facility - nothing sexy about their footwear. A stewardess would come round just before take-off handing out boiled sweets (=hard candy?) with the idea that all the sucking would help your ears 'pop' - if you tried to take more than one it was likely you wouldn't walk off the plane and if you didn't take one their response was much the same - the sweets were not optional and they let you know it.

Ah, the good old days.....

 

This mornings Washington Post had a article about a lady in LA who went to the airport in a bikini. she did not want to go through the scanners. When the TSA pat down lady saw her she said go on.

 

Well, that's the ticket then....
Looks like Lotsie and Goaljinky get a free pass if you guys wear your "Special" two piece black outfits. Oh, the horror....

 

:lol:

Mark

 

Nah. You haven't seen the picture of me in a two piece bikini. I definitely look like I'm packing. The TSA would assuredly want to pat me down. At least the female agents would. :cornut:

 

Man boobs? LOL

 

Duh. What else would it be?

 

They could do mankinis with airline logos on them as part of the frequent flyer programs...



Obviously, carrying your shoes like that is a no-no.

 

That is just wrong on so many levels.... but guess there would be little chance of a pat down......or up.

 

Not down, not up... and probably not even sideways



But hey, if Borat wears it, it's cool, yeah?

 

In a word? No.

 

Adam Savage (Mythbusters) passes through TSA with 12" razor blades

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3yaqq9Jjb4"]YouTube - #w00tstock Seattle: Adam Savage says "WTF, TSA?"[/ame]

 

Traveling over the holidays, TSA was unusually polite and upbeat. I wonder if it's some new policy or just orders for the holidays.

 

I thought men patted down men and women patted down women..
Just go thru the body scan, who cares if someone sitting at the screen gets to see you "virtually" naked, believe me they don't want to see most of them peoples naked anyway!!!
On the other side of the coin, as far as a hijack.. All they have to do it once the pilots get on board their door is locked from the inside and for NO reason do they open it.. Kill them all but they don't get control of the plane. .Pilots make enough money, they can pee in a cup and bring a sandwich.. They now get to skip the scan so they have more time to eat and pee anyway...

 

4TH AMENDMENT UNDERCLOTHES

 

I like It!!

:cornut:

 

LOL...as a pilot, Currently enrolled in school to learn how to drive a truck so I can put food on the table for a few months till I can fly again (the economy sucks, and I have 7000+ hrs accident free, clean record, and 15+ years experience), I can tell you VERY FEW pilots make "big money" these days...the old gray beard guys do OK (anybody under the age of 45 is kinda SOL)..they have old UNION contracts, like some of the older UAW guys in Detroit, but for the most part, we took huge pay-cuts, benefit reduction, furloughs, and layoffs over the last 10+ years. Our hotels have gone from Hyatt to Red Roof (no joke), and we brown bag lunches (well, buy it at a food court for $8.00 BK combo meal...the airline will not even give us a sandwich or bottle of water unless our contract says they must. If a crew member want a bottle of water, it is an "expense"....a cost center....most contracts get you a 1 liter bottle per day...
As to the body scanner for pilots....doing it several times a day, is a pain, and at this point it is BELIEVED to be safe for lots of use, but so was Asbestos, Cigarettes, and many other products in the past that have proven to be dangerous after a time.
And Pilots DO OPEN THE LOCKED DOOR IN FLIGHT. We just get the curtain to closed, get am attendant to block the isle, and use the LAV. :eek6:
On all but the widebody(with an extra jump-seat), trying to use a "truckers buddy" (a bottle) in what may be a mixed sex cockpit would be nearly impossible...everything is built around you...in some ways you have less space than a MINI...and much of it is sensitive to moisture....